I read a heart wrenching story where a nine year old boy, Jack Garcia, was handcuffed and beaten to death by his mother’s boyfriend. The reason for the brutality was…brace yourself…sneaking a piece of birthday cake. Birthday cake that was probably his because his birthday was just a few days before.
The mother was at work but the uncle was present when all of this was taking place and tried to intervene by taking the handcuffs off. Jack begged for the beatings to stop but the boyfriend continued hitting him knocking him unconsciousness. What happens next is beyond unbelievable.
The uncle called 911 to report that the boy was unconscious but when the police arrive Jack’s mother assured them that he was OK and was just congested. She could have saved her son’s life but instead she chose to protect her boyfriend.
We’ve all seen way too many stories like this….a boyfriend kills the girlfriend’s child while “disciplining” them.
But I want to make one thing clear….whether you spank or not…beating a child is NOT discipline.
However, because there are so many people who subscribe to spanking as a means of discipline, the lines become blurred for someone whose doing so out of intense anger.
If you are a woman in a relationship with a man who is not the father of your child, do not allow him to physically “discipline” your child.
If you’ve only known him for just a few weeks/months, then please do not leave your child in his care.
I’m not implying that all boyfriends are bad guys. But you need to discuss positive ways that he will be allowed to exercise authority that doesn’t involve hitting your children.
One thing that works for me is having a stern voice when I’m serious about something. Usually that’s all that’s needed to let my kids know that I’m serious.
Another thing that’s often overlooked when disciplining children is simply just having a conversation with them about why their behavior is wrong. Get them to open up to you, ask them why did they did it. Find an appropriate consequence. Do what works for your family. But don’t allow your children to become a casualty in your relationship with your boyfriend. No matter how much you think you love each other, it’s very likely that he is not as invested in your child as you are (or in this case, should be).
Jack did not deserve to die in that manner. His mother should also be held responsible for his death. If she would have allowed the paramedics to take him to the hospital he would probably be alive today.
RIP Jack Garcia
Original story here